Marli started saying that to me at the start of EVERY service when she’d bring in her first docket for the night. It got on my tits because it was a statement repeated night, after night, after night, after night, after night, after night. And life at the time seemed to be a series of never ending repetition, after repetition, after repetition – ad infinitum. Pardon my room full of tautological mirrors.
Neither of us function terribly well under a life of consistency. I’m a fan of finding where the boundaries lie then constantly nudging them. Once they’ve been pushed as far as I plausibly seem able without destroying the view people tend to have of me as THIS KIND OF PERSON (inoffensive) with PARTICULAR ATTRIBUTES (subject to circumstance) on which they CAN RELY, I get bored. Marli cares a whole lot less what people think of her, much to her credit. None of this is to pretend that we are not creatures of habit.
I tend to think of us as one of the FEW – Fat, Entitled and White. Or maybe Full of Existential Wankst. Either way, it’s splitting hairs & all our problems were of a First World nature. Mr Maslow didn’t tell us what to do next (Which sounds very trite because it is; I make NO claims to having achieved self-actualization – that would take more effort than I have been (up till now) willing to deploy. We are middle class dilettantes and we want it NOW!).
So we sold our house and moved to Thailand for an unspecified period of time to do rather vaguely defined things on the proceeds. How self-indulgent. Rather like this little diatribe.
And so it begins.